The stupid way to be selfish is… seeking happiness for ourselves alone. In his 1996 book ‘The Way to Freedom’, he said “If you would like to be selfish, you should do it in a very intelligent way. One of the Dalai Lama’s more surprising philosophical takes revolves around the idea of wise or intelligent selfishness. “This kind of compassion meditation actually shows that often the best way to be kind to yourself is to develop an eagerness and ability to help others. This idea has been referred to as wise selfishness, or intelligent selfishness. This may come across as slightly at odds with the popular self-help mantra of ‘I need to look after myself’ however, this kind of compassion meditation actually shows that often the best way to be kind to yourself is to develop an eagerness and ability to help others. As such, we can train the mind to turn a negative (suffering) into a positive (the cure for that suffering). What makes this Tibetan Meditation different is that it involves specifically visualising giving out whatever it is that will ease suffering. As this suggests, the practice contains parallels with Loving-Kindness Meditation (also known as Metta Bhavana). With disease rampant across the country, meditation masters began using Tonglen as a distant healing technique for those who were ill. Historically, Tonglen Meditation has links to the leprosy crisis which swept Tibet in the 11th century. This is founded upon the principle of changing our perception and attitude towards pain – for more on the difference between pain and suffering, check out our article on the subject. This reflects the practice’s interest in taking in pain and giving out compassion, with the goal of connecting with personal suffering and overcoming fear. The word Tonglen, or Tong Len, is Tibetan for “Sending and Taking”, with Tong meaning “giving or sending” and Len referring to “receiving or taking”. An ancient practice which revolves around cultivating compassion through visualisation, Tonglen derives from the Lojong (meaning ‘mind training’) branch of Tibetan Buddhism, which involves meditation, contemplation, and compassion. Most spiritual practices within Buddhism are shaped by a commitment to growing compassion, and Tonglen is no exception. But what does Tonglen meditation mean, and how should it be practised? Today, we’ll take you through the basics, and give you everything you need to have a go at this unique method. This is certainly true of the art of Tonglen Meditation, a thousand-year-old practice based on laying the foundations for compassion both in your meditation and across your life. However, many meditation styles are no longer guided by a spiritual path, having been adopted within various therapeutic or secular contexts because of their ability to foster calmness, peace of mind, and emotional intelligence. Ancient Buddhist practices represent the root of most modern forms of meditation.
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